Breaking Free!
(Go get yourself together! Start the journey of becoming the new YOU)
Enough is enough! An old-age expression that is quite a cliché. Be it tonight's dinner, what series you'll decide to binge-watch, or which brand of electronic accessory you would love to have your hands on, at some point, you need to pick.
We take time to decide the optimal option or consider the most reasonable alternative. This often leads people to overthink and stress themselves out, hindering their ability to complete urgent tasks.
Sadly, a lot of us are guilty of this. Some people wait for the perfect time and moment to execute a more concise plan. And ended up not doing anything or accomplishing something significant.
Enough is Enough
Yes, you heard it right! Enough with overthinking and time to put some action. I know firsthand how standing at a crossroads can be quite uncomfortable. Choosing something that would lead you to something significant in life is very nerve-wracking.
But you can't just live underneath a rock and wish everything is going to be okay because it doesn't happen that way. Action makes things work, and our inability to take the right action hinders us from getting the results we're looking for.
If you're asking when is the best time to take action? I guess it's now. The longer the waiting game, the less chance you'll see results. Stop being content that you have plans. Take action. Proceed with the steps. It doesn't matter if you fail in your early attempts.
You'll only fail when you stop, but as long as you continue to move and proceed forward, you're only struggling, but you are not failing. When you call it quits, then it is the end of it and you lose. You're back to zero, and that makes changing sucks.
We need to suck at some point
One article in the New York Post tells us that it's alright to suck at something. Well, they even picked an interesting title that it's great to suck at something.
Failing at something isn't exactly the feeling we're trying to have when we decide to take action. The idea of falling is disappointing, it even brings back negative feelings we try suppressing for a long time.
And this makes us toxic not only to ourselves but also to others. Unconsciously, you succumbed to bitterness and hatred. You become hard to please, and you begin to feel glad for someone else's misfortunes.
It's a typical scenario, but the thing is, you don't need to be a part of that kind of setting. You have the power to choose how you would like to end up. Our inability to take the right action at the right time can deeply impact how we want life to become.
Decide now, when enough is enough! Remember, not to be afraid of falling, but be afraid of becoming the person you hated because you fail to take charge and do things you should be doing.
Learning to be grateful at all times
When was the last time you thanked yourself for taking a nice and warm bath? Or had been extremely grateful to yourself for gulping a glass of cold water rather than a sugary, carbonated beverage?
Pretty basic right? But have you done some of those things lately? Or you're too busy with whatever it is you're doing that you overlook things that would make things easier for you and others?
Are you aware that drinking a glass of water is a struggle for some people? Or have you seen people experiencing excruciating pain just to do things that you do easily without a second thought, like peeing or taking a dump?
If doing some things like walking with ease, taking restroom breaks without someone assisting you, or listening to others talking without using hearing devices attached to your ear.
Give yourself a pat on the back and be extremely grateful. Because you don't have to struggle with those things. Plainly, you're just too darn lucky compared to others.
After a cold bath on a hot day, I can't stop smiling because it just makes me super relieved and comfortable. Hearing a few splashes lets me appreciate the moment because I'm aware that on the other part of the globe, they are counting even the minute drops. Water is so scarce for them.
So the next time, you turned on the shower knob, don't forget to say thank you and enjoy your bath. Others aren't as lucky as you.
Forgive and move on!
Does this sound cliché: “I forgive, but I don't forget.”
Indeed, it's difficult forgetting something that scarred and made you miserable but continuing to harbor it deep in your emotions won't make you feel better.
It even makes you the person you dreaded becoming.
Here's a drawback to that. Not forgetting something that offended you in the past may create an insignificant obstacle toward attaining tranquility with yourself.
I remember in my earlier years, that's when I was offended, my instincts would tell me I had to get even right away, or else, I wouldn't sleep the night off. It was such a chaotic stage of my life. It was like an "eye for an eye"!
Then it came to a point, that I was hit unintentionally, but since I had this instinct, my reaction was to retaliate with full force and not think of any consequence.
Then something hit me hard that made me realize that I was such a jack @-$-$!
I was about to retaliate against a little kid! In a fragile health condition, and I'm half her size.
What was I thinking! It could have ended worse, and I'll be regretting something because I didn't use my head and think straight.
Good thing, an ice cream passed by fast and got my attention. Yeah, that ice cream saved me from my vengeful self. (That explains my fondness for Rocky Road because that flavor saved me from doing something extremely stupid)
I was cooled off while feasting on a cone of Rocky Road. I had to buy it hastily because the ice cream was moving fast, it was a No Stopping Zone, and the ice cream man was hesitant to give me one, but I was persistent.
When my sight gazed at my perpetrator, I was so ashamed because I saw she was held tight by a lady and taking deep breaths from a nebulizer due to asthma. If not for that darn ice cream, I could only think of the worst.
Until now, I could still hear my conscience telling me that I was such a dork! If I had been very impulsive. That experience taught me a valuable lesson. Some fights are won even without battles.
How to break free
After a long battle with yourself, you realize that you need to step up your game and make the odds in your favor. How should you do it? Is there any special magic spell you need to do to make things happen your way?
Tip no. 1: Admit you're wrong
Acknowledging one's faults and rough edges is an integral part of change. Not admitting you're wrong is tantamount to not wanting to change. It's such an issue if an individual does not accept that they are erring.
Correction only comes after admission. No amount of lip service will make something wrong correct. Start by being truthful to yourself and acknowledge that you need to work hard on things you can control.
What are these things you can control?
- You can choose not to be angry anymore.
- You can decide kindness against aggression.
- You can decide to be happy rather than being grumpy and a sour puss all the time.
- You can select empathy rather than being vindictive.
Tip no. 2: Build rapport, rather than destroying it
You need to realize that when you're with people, expect the unexpected. There are times when people can be quite inconsistent. One moment they're amiable, the next minute, they are a fiery ablaze.
Tip no. 3: Just let it go
Did someone make a remark about your social media post? Did someone accidentally eat your sandwich by mistake?
Are you being cut off in a line?
It's so easy to just flare up and tell them that they are being unfair. I admit, to succumbing to these reactions when I feel I'm being mistreated. So what would I do, I take a few steps back, reflect for some time, and ask myself this question: "Is it really worth it?"
Does confronting someone head-on will make things better? Or it will just dive to the worst?
Surely, winning an argument is such a great ego booster, but will it make you a better person?
Nope! It will only make you appear argumentative, and people will avoid you because you're aggressive and would appear perfectionist, even if you're not.
Next time, if it's just petty things, and won't hurt you bad. Let it go.
In conclusion
Breaking free from old habits that prevent you from developing into a new individual is challenging. You could read a ton of materials, watch countless hours of video, or even listen to a never-ending series of podcasts, but if you don't admit to yourself that you need to improve, it will be pointless.
You have to start somewhere, yes, you'll find out you need to improve on a lot of things. But that's alright. In your early attempts, you'll fail a lot, and you'll fail hard, but that's alright.
You need to focus on things you can control and from there, start your baby steps toward self-improvement. Avoid comparing yourself with others because it will only lead you to be bitter about your shortcomings. We have different timelines.
Enjoy your journey toward improvement. I'm aware you'll find bumps along the way. It's okay to laugh at yourself when you're confused, it's alright to be sad and vulnerable because we all are. Be open to criticisms and choose to be emphatic.
But most of all, try to adopt a mindset that tells you that you came from a place of help.
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