Every one of us, at some point, clings to something. It could be a physical object, like your favorite toy, a huggable old pillow, or a memory you strive to keep for a long time.
It is something we hold dear, and losing it would leave us feeling empty and crushed. Being vulnerable lets us realize we don't have to fight our battles alone.
A healthy support system is an excellent way of going through stages in our lives that are difficult and extremely challenging.
Everything is so against you. What's next?
When we face adversity, we usually seek a source of strength to help us bounce back. Sometimes, we end up finding what we never expected or hoped for.
A classic example is experiencing an event in our lives that leads us to think it's the break we have prayed for, but only to realize it's what makes our ordeal more difficult than it was before.
It makes us more frustrated with how things turn out. And not having a firm grasp on our personal resolve would shake our self-belief to its very core. The sad part, we find it hard to fathom why we struggle so much when we just want to make things better.
We overthink a lot of things, leading to impaired judgment on our part. We now struggle with things we typically do easily. Is it because we are getting dull and we're slipping a lot? Or is it because we over-complicate things, and not realizing that the simpler things work?
At some point, I have been a victim of this predicament. I wrote about this topic because of a past emotional, ominous experience.
I strive hard every day not to return to that state. The feeling of not seeing any tint of light at the end of the tunnel was such a gloomy yesteryear, and things can get extremely messy at any rate if you can't bounce back from that emotional turmoil.
Why it seems there's no light at the end of the tunnel?
When all hope is gone, the will to fight and stand firm on your ground will go with it. It's not that there's no light, it is because we decide not to see it.
Imagine pricking your finger with a small thorn. Your first reaction is to get your hands off instantly and remove any object that's stinging the heck in your finger.
But despite your best efforts to remove the source of your discomfort, that darn thorn remains buried deep in your skin, causing minor irritation. So you resort to just ignoring it until your finger gets used to the pain and tolerates the painful ordeal.
Your false sense of comfort deceives your ability to judge because it leads you to think that it's just a small thing, no biggie! Your continued pretension that everything is alright makes you think everything is under control.
And that's where you are fatally mistaken!
The problem with ignoring things is that it makes you feel like it's going to go away and never come back.
But just when you think everything seems fine, your concern resurfaces. And it now comes along with other issues that resulted from ignoring a pesky minor discomfort.
Not only that, you start to be frustrated at yourself for not addressing it right away when you have the chance.
Returning to our example, the thorn that was buried in your skin causing your discomfort got infected.
It stayed there for a while, and when it turned into a full-blown infection, from a minor discomfort, it turned so excruciating and painful that it now prevents you from doing things you normally do effortlessly.
You now have a fever because it got red, swollen, and infected. And rather than addressing that little thorny concern of yours, you now have bigger issues to face, which is how to bring the fever down.
If you just removed it when it stuck on your finger, you wouldn't have to bear the pain you're feeling now.
So why there's no light at the end of the tunnel? Because you choose to ignore it by closing your eyes and pretending it's not there. If you just focus your sight on the brief flicker ahead, you could have reached that bright spot where the tunnel's exit is just a step away.
The frustration you feel would add more fuel, and you entertain the idea of just quitting and succumbing to any negative thoughts and feelings that come your way.
And worse, people who are witnessing your pain and want to extend their hands so you can grab onto them, you drive them away because you want to operate as a one-man army and fight alone undisturbed.
The sad thing about getting frustrated
When you don't get the results you badly desire, your frustration creeps in.
The greater the expectation, the greater the frustration if things don't come one's way.
And sadly, it leads you to be overly upset, and it crushes your confidence. Your frustration lingers in your system longer, and this makes you insecure about everything.
Not managing your frustration well results in you getting easily upset with almost anything.
You also become highly irritable over little things. Your stress management ability becomes questionable, leading you to a downward spiral of emotional turmoil.
But it's not really an absolute bad when you get frustrated about failing to hit your goals.
It's a telltale sign that you're a normal human being like everyone else.
But you've got to be wary because if you don't see frustration's claws grasping you by the neck, you'll find yourself in some oddly dark place where crawling out could pose a serious challenge.
Stop believing that you're done
It takes a strong moral resolve to crawl out and leave the dark realms of frustration. When you feel that you've had enough, you lose the will to fight. Reaching out to someone and letting them know of your vulnerability can be quite helpful.
You need to accept and realize that life isn't a bed of roses. You'll fail, and you'll get a lot of heartaches. It's easy to be overwhelmed when you feel you swam with all your might, and you're not reaching the shore because you feel you're not budging an inch.
Anything you find at this stage becomes a shiny object because you're super desperate to hold on to something. A lot of times, people during this dark period will cling to something or someone that would help them feel good.
And that's where people who stick with you through thick and thin level the field. For goodness' sake, stop driving them away. People who want you to succeed get upset when they see you diving head straight towards self-destruction.
That's what happens when you're lurking in the dark for some time. It's easy to misinterpret their concern with being nosy and stuff. Put it this way: you don't want to see someone dear to you do things that will sabotage their dreams and potential.
Because that's what love is. The ability of a person to endure hearing nasty remarks from people they hold so close is a remarkable feat for anyone. If that ain't love, then I don't know what that is.
You may think you're done, but the people who believe in you refuse to accept that and would fight tooth and nail just to make you see you're not seeing things clearly. And the least you can do is to be grateful and help yourself get back up and running.
I hope this helps shed light on you. It would be wonderful to read your thoughts about the things you've read on my blog. My coffee is getting cold. I have to take a sip before it becomes unbearable. So long! Ciao.
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