When you keep thinking that you can't do something for whatever reasons you have, that's a limiting belief.
When you're about to do something, you keep thinking of ways not to do it. That's also a limiting belief.
So what is then a limiting belief?
Asana defines limiting belief as a belief you set yourself to not do anything.
For years, I have constantly struggled to get rid of the thought that I'm not good at doing things. Even starting this blog has kept me awake and preoccupied because the moment I touch the keys, thoughts keep on creeping in.
I even deliberately self-sabotage myself by binge-watching so I can tell myself that I cannot do it because I'm still watching TV. At some point, it provided "a sense of comfort" because of my twisted way of justifying my shortcomings.
Spiraling down at an alarming rate
A scary thing about limiting beliefs is that it drags you down. It makes you look at some things negatively. You feel bitter about almost everything and want to see failure for others so all of you would be in the same boat.
Pretty lame, right? But that's what limiting belief does. It transforms you into someone whom you are not. You become a hater of success because it makes you see what you cannot accomplish.
And worst, you infect others with negative thoughts, not realizing what you have become. To put it this way, you have become your own worst enemy.
And without someone telling you that "you're out of control, " getting out would be difficult because your actions deceive you. You start to think that you're doing okay and there's nothing wrong with it.
And most of the time, you resist change because the deception runs deep down to your core. We have been hearing about limiting beliefs, but looking at them from a whole new perspective would help us identify them and take action so they won't make us the person we don't want to become.
Bouncing back from adversity
Getting back and moving right on track can be a challenge. When you're used to a routine, unlearning it is tricky. Unless you have someone who's not buying your BS and wants nothing but to see you succeed and get happy.
So how do you get back? You need to admit you're having a problem and you are the problem. Self-denial would only make things worse. Admitting you need help is one step closer to getting your life back on track.
It's not rocket science that understanding what causing the problem is the first step toward recovery. But sadly, some continue to stick to a condition they feel comfortable. Once they don't get the expected results, they revert to that state and continue the toxicity toward themselves and others.
And this will become a never-ending vicious cycle of obnoxious behavior that leads to unhappiness. I'm sure you abhor leading this kind of life. To steer you out of your limiting beliefs, follow these steps and lead a happier existence because you deserve it.
Identify your limiting beliefs - According to Socrates, "Know thyself". Logically, you need to examine everything about yourself. What are the things that make you happy, or the things that make you sad, or what ticks you off? Understanding these things would help you develop an action plan to help you adjust, adapt, and act accordingly.
For example, you want to learn how to cook. But the memory of the last time you cooked lingers in your memory because the entire house smelled like burnt rubber. You remember how everyone got so disgusted, and scoffed into your face to "get the hell out".
So each time you tried donning the apron, that bitter affair flashed out and left you freezing out cold and sweating. And fast forward, you hate going to the kitchen and get contented with ordering from a fast food.
Rather than allowing yourself to be consumed by that traumatic experience, recall what led to that unfortunate event and analyze what went wrong.
Start practicing and do not let yourself get distracted by anything like your mobile phone because it may be the reason things didn't work out right.
After some time, you'll notice you're getting better at it. And the mistake that made you miserable would serve as a lesson, so you'll be more attentive to the task you're doing.
Wake up and realize it's all on your mind. The thing with limiting beliefs is it's in your head. Sometimes, it is something you've invented and believe to be true.
It may even be the experience of someone you thought to be an expert, and since that person is an expert based on your criteria. You generalize everything they say and apply it to yourself without even trying it first.
And you end up scared of something you thought to be scary. It inhibits your self-development and wastes the opportunity to become the better version of yourself. Remember, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
Challenge your excuses. It doesn't need an explanation. When you hear yourself saying "You can't do it, ", ask yourself, "Why can't I do it?". If you can't give a suitable answer, it's just an excuse. Period.
Sometimes the phrase "I'm busy, I've a lot to do" is an excuse not to do things you love. When you're already comfortable with where you are now, you are no longer motivated to try new things. It's just it is. Because comfort kills motivation.
The next time you hear telling yourself, "Don't do it!", asses if you truly could not do it, or you don't want to do it. There's a mile of difference between could and want.
Adopting a new mindset. When your old way of thinking no longer applies to the person you want to become, it's time to adopt a new way of doing things. If you continue sticking with your old mindset, you'll end up doing the old things that are holding you back.
For example, when you're little, you almost drown. That's why you hate swimming. Now you've grown a couple of inches and could step comfortably without getting drowned.
Sadly, each time you reach that part where you almost drown, you freeze and get jittery. I know it's hard to get rid of that memory because both I and my son experienced that kind of trauma.
But thankfully, we both conquered the fear of drowning and now enjoy swimming in deep waters. You just need to face your fear and conquer it by overcoming it. There's no other way.
Practice your newfound ability often. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect. To become an expert at something, you need to do it frequently. The feeling of doing something once is a great morale-booster, but to become adept at it, you have to do it every single time.
In conclusion, limiting beliefs can hinder us from reaching our true potential. It even makes us the person we hate becoming. To get rid of things that make us bitter is acknowledging that there is a problem and analyzing what makes it a problem.
Toning down our egos can help us see clearer and improve more easily. I understand that there will always be resistance coming from ourselves because unlearning something we have been doing for a long time is uncomfortable.
But as they say, when you start to be uncomfortable, that's where your growth starts. I wish you all the best and hopefully, in the future, we can both share a cup of coffee and talk about things that make life interesting.
So long, Ciao!
